It was a frustrating opening week for the Lock family as four, one-point losses stood between them and a perfect weekend. As it was, 
Uncle Gil of Ryno Rife sports handicappers was winless, drawing the wrath of his nephew, Pad.
“I know it’s the first week”, said Pad, ” but c’mon, Uncle Gil. An ohfer?” “I went to summer camp in Maine with the worst handicapper ever. Couldn’t pick a winner in a one-horse race. Even he would have gotten one right.”
This little Rife rift is something to watch, as the Locks have taken action against disappointing results in the past. One suspects that, should Pad go to the bullpen, old standby, Johnny Duduguande, could make his 2011 debut.
What gives Pad the authority to make such a move? “Hey, I’m the guy carrying this team. That’s the nuts and bolts of it. If Uncle Gil doesn’t like it, let him sell cold cuts on the Jersey Shore!”
With that threat as motivation, Gil looks to turn things around this Saturday.
