Gil Lock Happy to Be Back
by Eddie Mayrose

One casualty of the respite taken by those here at Fantasy Sports Dirt was Gil Lock, the guru of Ryno Rife Sports Handicapping.  During our ryno-rife5previous run, we featured Gil’s weekly college football selections, often with less than stellar results.  There came a point, actually, that things got so rough, his wife Jill and nephew Pad were summoned to his rescue, eventually being featured in the column as well.

Last week, after an incessant barrage of calls from Gil trumpeting his huge success over the first three weeks of the season and demanding that we restore his forum.  Careful what you wish for, Gilly boy, as this didn’t go so well the first time around.  That said, it is with great pleasure that we re-re-reintroduce our Locks of the Week. Continue reading »

It’s an expression we hear from time to time, usually to explain away boorish or illogical behavior by the faithful followers of a particular sports cheap_seats_3-150x150team.  “You know”, some expert will always opine, “ the word ‘fan’ comes from fanatic.”  Deep stuff, to be sure, but not a blanket answer for every situation, and, especially not deep enough to cover the nonsense coming out of the Bronx this weekend, where, it seems, “fanatic” is another word for idiot.

Let’s dismiss, for now,  the ridiculous notion that River Avenue should be renamed “Rivera” Avenue in honor of retiring pitcher Mariano Rivera.  We’ll save that for another column, although, I’m wondering how a relief pitcher toiling for the same team as Ruth, Gehrig, Mantle, DiMaggio and Berra becomes the first for whom a street is named. Continue reading »

It’s been a while between Cheap Seats, something pointed out to me by good friends that either enjoy my writing or politely lie about it. Took a stab at earning some money on another site but, alas, the industry is fraught with cheap_seats_3-150x150dishonorable people making a living from the talent of others. It’s ironic that I’d make the decision to turn my back on them so close to this terrible anniversary, one that, through all its sadness, reminds me of the friends with whom I’ve been blessed throughout my life. Today, in particular, Bernie Schumer, Tim Fitzpatrick, Anthony Raisley, Paul McDonald, Brendan Grady and Ryan Gillock are in my heart and mind as I recall the support they provided to me and each other during that horrific Tuesday morning. We’ve all fallen on difficult times since that day, some more than others. The saddest fact, however, is that we no longer spend our days together on the NYSE floor, a place where your word was everything, and loyalty was a way of life. I miss them all every day, but, especially, on this day. For some reason, this year’s remembrance is a little more painful for me. I have no idea why. I’m hoping that a few retro posts, about good that overcame evil, might make me feel a little better. Worth a shot, anyway.

Continue reading »

Questions I’ve Been Waiting to Ask
by Eddie Mayrose

Here we are, two days before the end of the world.  According to the Mayans, those fun-loving Guatemalans whose civilization, some time around 900 A.D., simply vanished, December 21, 2012 will bring the curtain down on mankind’s Broadway run.

Now, I have to admit, the Mayan credibility takes a bit of a hit when you realize they probably thought they’d see the final performance; only to fall one or eleven centuries short.  But, once Hollywood made the movie, I figured it had to be true.

Therefore, I’ve abandoned my plans for, what now seems, unnecessary Christmas shopping and begun to get things in order. I don’t know if I’ll need a bag, but I’ve packed one, anyway.  And, yes, I’ve included some warm weather apparel because, well, I might need it.  Yet, as the date approaches, I find myself excited by the prospect of, finally, having some questions answered by the Big Guy.  You know, those things in a lifetime that, no matter how much time passes, always make you wonder.  Having no idea how much time I’ll have alone with Him, I decided it would be prudent to knock my list down to ten, so as to focus on the really, really important stuff.  Who knows?  Maybe He watches Letterman, too.

So, submitted for your approval and as the last column with which I’ll bore you, (you hope), here are the Top Ten questions I’d like to ask God.

Continue reading »

Only One Way To Replace Jeter
by Eddie Mayrose

Imagine that you’ve booked Tom Clancy to speak at a writing seminar and, on his way to the podium, he falls and breaks his ankle. Just when you think all is lost, Clive Cussler rises from his seat in the audience and agrees to take over.   Imagine, still, that Elton John will be performing at your daughter’s Sweet Sixteen party.  As he’s stepping out of his car, however, he falls and breaks his ankle.  As your little girl begin to cry, the father of one of her friends, some guy named Billy Joel, mentions that he plays the piano a little bit and would be happy to step in.  Impossible scenarios?  Absolutely.  But, despite the odds, it’s exactly where Joe Girardi finds himself this morning.  Continue reading »

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